Listing Important Reminders
by TueyTwoShoes
Summary: This is a collection of lists compiled by me,my reviewers, and profiles I read. Don't worry, I give credit! Lists such as Important Life Lessons Learned In Twilight, Things I Swear Never To Do In Twilight World, and more!
1. Life Lessons I Learned From Twilight

A/N: **I wanted to have a bit of fun with a series of one shots and I figured that lists were the only way I could possibly be funny and serious at one time. Here is list #1**

**One note: numbers 1-30 on this list were taken from the profile of a reviewer of mine, _crazyobsessedtwilightfan _I don't want people reveiwing me and getting all huffy because I stole this from their profile or anything. I like to read profiles, saw this list, and had the bright idea for this story.**

57 Life Lessons Twilight Has Taught Us

1: You can enjoy the bouquet even though you resist the wine

2: The future is not set in stone

3: Men are crabby when they're hungry

4: Nothing beats an irritable grizzly bear

5: True love knows no boundaries

6: Some people are just danger magnets

7: Even eternal enemies can band together to save something they love

8: Forget the fangs, real vampires sparkle!

9: Soul mates exist, even if it takes 100 years to find them

10: Porsche 911 Turbos make great bribes

11: Friendship is like the sun on a cloudy day

12: Snow just means it's too cold for rain

13: Family is about more than just blood

14: What's worth doing is worth over-doing

15: Loosing your temper can be a hair- raising thing

16: "Vegetarian" has many meanings

17: Even monsters have humanity

18: There are exceptions to every rule

19: Always verify bad news before doing something stupid

20: Hearing voices in your head doesn't necessarily mean you're crazy

21: Love means you're willing to sacrifice your happiness for another's

22: Cold hands Warm heart

23: Not breathing is uncomfortable

24: Stupid lambs and masochistic lions make quite a pair

25: Romeo was an idiot

26: Twilight is the safest and saddest time of day

27: Extreme sports should not be attempted alone

28: Life is worth very little without someone to share it with

29: Space heaters can be very annoying

30: Love can make even the most miserable places paradise

31: Don't assume a marriage proposal is a joke

32: It is possible to be in love with two people at once

33: Don't judge a book by it's cover

34: You shouldn't be affected by territorial disputes between mythical creatures

35: Never lead a friend on

36: A clean break is impossible

37: Pizza tastes like dirt

38: Rusty red trucks are reliable

39: Your own eyes never lie

40: Making decisions is the painful part, following them is not

41: It is very possible that your best friend is in love with you

42: Don't drive while you're intoxicated by someone's presence

43: Baseball is for _everyone_

44: Being able to read minds isn't all it's cracked up to be

45: Some people can develop a conscience with no outside help at all

46: People with big muscles aren't always scary

47: Beautiful people aren't necessarily happy

48: Find a special place where you can go on sunny days

49: Skipping biology on Blood-Typing day isn't a bad idea

50: Blushing makes you beautiful

51: Ghost stories can turn out to be true

52: Love conquers all

53: Tragedy brings enemies together

54: Never look back

55: Sometimes people don't see themselves clearly

56: Friendship comes from unexpected places

57: Never kiss someone while hooked up to a heart monitor

* * *

**A/N: Please note that every list I post is ongoing and will be added to every time I get a good idea from a reviewer or think of something else to add. the list will extend IN IT'S ORIGINAL CHAPTER. I cannot stress that enough. If a new chapter is post, IT IS A WHOLE NEW LIST!**

**Thank You!**

**Your Lister,  
Tuey**


	2. Things I Swear Never To Do In Forks

A/N: **WEll, I had three wonderful reviewers tell me to update, and I figured that I'd give them a break and a laugh and let them read this list, which I had all set and ready. **

**PS Remember, when I update a list, IT'S IN THE SAME CHAPTER. Just a reminder!**

**And, I'd really like to make this list longer, so if you have any suggestions at all please tell me! You get credit and an invisible cookie (that comes from Rosalie McCarty, for those who care. Read her stuff, she's a fantastic author!).**

32 Things I Swear Never Do In Twilight World

1: I swear never to tell a vampire they're looking mighty hungry today

2: I swear never to follow a person who addresses herself as "Heidi"

3: I swear never to attempt to play baseball with vampires

4: I swear never to tell Bella I'm Edward's fiancée.

5: I swear never to tell Reneesme that her real name is Vanessa Wolfe

6: I swear never to deny Alice a shopping trip

7: I swear never to say that Alice's credit card has been declined

8: I swear never to tell Rose that I'm pregnant

9: I swear never to tell Jacob that Nessie has a boyfriend

10: I swear never to tell Jacob that Edward left Bella again

11: I swear never to ask Bella when the next baby is due

12: I swear never to I swear not to blast "Sexy Back" every time Edward walks in the room

13: I also swear never to blast "Who Let The Dogs Out" outside of Jacob's house

14: I swear never to tell Quil that Claire has a boyfriend

15: I swear never to tell Leah she's a freak of nature

16: I swear never to shout "Stupid Shiny Volvo Owner" at Edward, nor tell Bella to

17: I swear never to ask Mike who stabbed Edward Cullen with a pencil

18: I swear never to ask Lauren if she heard that Tyler Crowley asked out Bella

19: I swear never to give Leah the number of a psychiatrist

20: I swear never to ask out Edward Cullen

21: I swear never to tell Angela that her best friend is a vampire

22: I swear never to tell Emily she looks hideous

23: I swear never to cut myself in front of Jasper

24: I swear never to piss off a werewolf

25: I swear never to tell Paul he has anger issues

26: I swear never to give Mike Bella's phone number

27: I swear never to burn Alice's closet

28: I swear never to buy the Cullens a pet

29: I swear never to give Emmet access to a lawn mower

30: I swear never to change my contacts from black to gold

31: I swear never to ask Esme if she's ever had a child of her own

32: I swear never to ask Caius if he's met the Children Of The Moon (is this right, i don't know if it's right)

33. I swear never to tell Nessie there is no Santa Claus

34: I swear never to ask Edward if he celebrates Christmas or Chankuah.

**Thank you to black to Leopard-colored eyes for I swear never to's 22-28! -hands an invisible cookie-**


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